I know the world is very concerned with selfies at the moment, especially group selfies because, are selfies really selfies if you have more than one person in the selfie. (Real world question). Then, it’s not really your true self is it… because you’re faking it till you make it – with all those friends who don’t really know you read with a flashlight till 12:30 at night on school nights. Whoops.
Since we can’t seem to get away from our phones for even three seconds, or until our next Candy Crush life comes up, here are some apps that would honestly be a better use of your time.
Appoetry. I tried, really. You can hashtag that. Maybe, Ipoetry, but then Samsung owners would be angry. Really though – Sam sung is a poem.
1. Fridge Poems
This is a free app at the app store and it’s almost brand spankin’ new. I’m that person that pulls a dining room table chair up to the hosts fridge and moves the words around for probably the entire night. Why do you have to talk to people, especially at parties where one fourth of the guests are sober and aggravated and the rest are trying to conduct themselves in a manner that we can’t tell their drooling a little bit from alcohol content. Now, you don’t even have to leave your corner, wallflowers. You can just download the Fridge Poems app and sit on those chairs that everyone puts up against the wall at their parties. They secretly want you to feel like it’s a high school gym and you’ve found a warm bleacher although that taffeta you chose to wear is still itching the back of your thighs. You can have coffee so you’re still hyped, and you look like a cool hipster who can drink coffee at night and still celebrate with a slumber party. Plus, with this app, you can change the color of your fridge, it never has to be cleaned, and any unholy moldy leftovers can stay stocked in the back for even longer. (Instant poetry app does the same thing, but costs $1.99. With Instant poetry app, you can change the picture behind the poem to one of your own. It’s almost like a broadside app. I’m just too cheap for all that).
Check me out, guys:
2. Notegraphy (from the creators of OMM Writer)
This isn’t necessarily a poetry app, but I use it to write my favorite quotes and then make myself look like I’m a typography designer on the side of you know, teaching with my hair on fire. It makes quotes look really awesome. There are a ton of different designs. If you’re sick of the old school way of highlighting, marking your page with those Post It notes that now come out of the highlighter, or you just want to carry the lines of poetry with you everywhere, this app is perfect. You can share everything you create on Instagram. I’m probably that annoying friend that talks about reading all the time on my Instagram and then takes hundreds of pictures of my face and outfits. If you don’t know which friend of yours is that friend, then your that friend.
3. Poetry Daily
Poetry Daily is one of my favorite poetry reading apps. I like it so much because it gives you current, contemporary poetry, not just Shakespeare or Whitman everyday. Because of this handy dandy app, I discover new up and coming literary magazines, new up and coming poets, and just damn good poems. It’s also really versatile. I like narrative poetry, and really disturbing word choice, but this app forces me to branch out and read all types of poems; nature inspired, body inspired, steam of conscious, rhyming, form poetry, etc. You can also decide if you want alerts on this app to remind you to read some freakin’ poems, people!
4. Poems By Heart (Penguin Classics)
I’m so going to ground my child with this app. If we aren’t living in test tubes, hooked up to machines when I have children, I mean. I know, I know, they say you shouldn’t force your child to write as punishment because then they’ll never like writing, but forcing your child to memorize poetry has to have some lovely benefits. This way, the child can’t get off punishment until they’ve memorized a certain number of poems and performed them with gusto to their parents. Can you tell I’ve never had children? Right now, I just have my freshman, who I make sing “I’m a little teapot” if they come in late. That’s the closest I can get.
Anyway, Poets By Heart is a poetry memorization tool. It’s like learning spanish in the car sometimes. You can listen to someone reading it in a male or female voice (that don’t sound like Brenda the GPS in your car) and then tap “Learn this.” I think you really have to want to impress your friends with Shakespeare to get this app, but hey, I’m doing it, and I’m not crazy.
You can literally pick a rhyme scheme on this app and the app will remind you to stay within your rhyme scheme. It’s a little fishy and has a few too many in-app purchases to make it really excellent, but it’s fun to write short little memoirs if you aren’t already addicted to the fridge app. I like to write my first lines in Poetreat and then take it to the paper for the rest of the poem. When I first saw this, I just really wished someone would create a Poe Dancing app where you could watch Edgar Allen Poe dance for two hours while you did your lesson plans. Unfortunately, no one has created that yet.
This is not to be confused with Porta Potty, or Porta Jon. I know this site says there are bowel movements, but not today, friends. This is the greeting cards of poetry apps. You can share your short poems with friends, collaborate with other users, and save your poems within the app. It does cost money at the app store, so you have to really read those negative reviews before you buy it. You can read other porta poets on the app in the “browse” section so you don’t have to feel like you’re alone – on the toilet – writing poetry. Don’t forget to wipe though, you might share something that you regret.
My favorite part, it counts your haiku for you so you’re right on the money when it comes to syllables. Too bad your theme is not ever “all that.”
I know that these apps have some silly names, a bit are forced and some come with monetary value that you may not have, especially if you’re a poet full time. Well, really just the traveling potty poems app. However, ach of these apps has introduced me to new ways to study and write poetry and that’s all we need for National Poetry Month, that sweet introduction. Then, we’re off.
For your viewing pleasure:
Last one, I promise:
Just wait for my favorite poetry memes day. Oh YES.